Secrets and Lies
by DixieH
Summary: Is Harm in trouble? What affect will the secrets and lies have on the lives of those around him? This also concludes the story line begun in Straight Forward.
1. Chapter 1

After Paraguay, after Simon Tanvere, and before the Admiral Resigns. This is a Mattie Free Universe and deviates from canon in other ways too. For those of you with knowledge of military procedures, I hope you can over look my blunders.

I suspect that you may have to read my story Straight Forward to "get" some of the stuff, but should stand alone - especially if you ignore everything except Harm and Mac.

Saturday - Day 1

With a flick of his wrist, AJ cast into the small pool just above his position in the stream. It was the last cast of a long day. As he reeled in the line, Owen Sebring called to him from the bank.

"Ready AJ?"

"On my way."

Together they walked the path up the steep bank to the narrow stretch of road where AJ's 4x4 was parked. At the truck they stripped off their waders, boots, and vests and stowed their rods and gear. Slamming the tailgate, AJ walked around and got into the cab. Owen slid into the passenger seat.

They were thirty minutes into the drive home, when AJ pulled into a restaurant parking lot. "Is this ok?"

"If the beer's cold it will be." Owen replied.

They ordered without looking at the menus; double burgers, fries and draft beer. "How's Joey?" Owen asked once the drinks arrived.

AJ took a sip from his mug. Lt. Commander Josephine Cassidy had been AJ's girlfriend for seventeen months. She was wiry and athletic, opinionated and passionate. They were a good match except for a couple of major impediments. The first was the most obvious and the least important to either one of them. AJ was nearly twenty years her senior. The second inconvenience was the small matter that they both served in the U.S. Navy. Rear Admiral AJ Chedwiggen was the Judge Advocate General and Joey worked in the Department of Defence in the area of finance and appropriations and was stationed at the Pentagon. From tremulous beginnings she and AJ had settled into a relationship which suited them both. They had talked about the ramifications of their association from the beginning, but until now it had never been an issue beyond their own debate.

AJ shrugged. "I haven't seen her in a couple of weeks. She was selected to lead an audit team at a contractor's facility."

Owen grinned. "So all that noise the Secretary made was just smoke?"

The uniformed waitress set their platters on the table with practiced grace. "Two more?" She asked nodding at the empty beer steins.

"Not for me" AJ said.

"Yeah I'll have another." Owen responded.

When his beer arrived he asked again. "So you don't think there was anything in the Sec Nav's warnings?"

"I don't know." AJ took another bite out of his burger.

"What's Joey think?" Owen asked. AJ wiped his mouth and took another drink, this one from his water glass.

"We haven't talked about it."

"AJ, you've got to be joking. Don't you think she needs to know the risk you're taking?"

"What risk? Our relationship doesn't affect good order and discipline, it isn't fraternization; we aren't in the same chain of command."

"Maybe not." Owen replied using a fry to make his point. "But if it is worth your boss' time to comment, maybe you should pay attention. You know as well as I do that even the appearance of impropriety could lead to the laying of charges. And that alone could have a negative impact on your career and hers; whether the facts are proven or not."

AJ chuckled. "Spoken like the upstanding member of the judiciary that you are."

Owen responded with a slight lift to the eyebrow. "You think you're bullet proof don't you?"

"It's not that. I just know we're not doing anything wrong. Like it was any of your business."

"Are you saying you took her all the way to Italy last year and you haven't gotten beyond first base?" Owen responded with a lighter tone.

AJ managed a grin. "Mind your own business old friend."

"Oh come on, I'm still with the original model, I was just wondering if a newer model was all it's cracked up to be?"

"I haven't actually been trying too hard. She has a career to protect and I don't want to jeopardize my nice fat pension remember?"

Owen nodded and let the subject slide.

Pulling into the drive a little after 2300 hours, AJ pulled the damp waders and boots out of the truck and set them to dry on the back porch. He flipped the latch on the dog kennel. Dammit wriggled out and zipped around the yard while he unloaded the rest of his gear. The message light on the phone on the kitchen wall was blinking. He kicked off his shoes and touched the button. There was only one message. A familiar voice said.

"I'm back."

AJ scrolled through the prompts and looked at the call history time stamp. It read 9:15 p.m. By the time he drove into Georgetown it would be midnight. She'd been in transit all day and was likely getting some well earned sack time. He whistled the dog in from the yard and went to use the head. He stood for a moment in front of the mirror. I'm too old for this he thought. He looked at his hair glinting silver in the light and the creases across his cheeks and brow He swept his hand over his head and down across his neck. "Ah what the hell." He said to the reflection.

He snapped off the light and stepped back into his shoes. In twenty five minutes he was knocking on her door. He had her key in his hand, but it seemed inappropriate to barge in unannounced. He wondered about phoning her from the door, but decided his voice in the hall wouldn't exactly impress her neighbours.

Suddenly the door opened. He stepped out of the hallway. Her bedside lamp cast a long shaft of light across the dark apartment. As soon as the dead bolt slid home, Joey's arms were around his neck. He kissed her upturned face and returned the embrace. She was nearly his height but built lean. Her white blonde hair, kept up in a knot for work, was loose across her shoulders. He slid his hand beneath her t-shirt, her back was warm to his touch. She pulled back slightly and he took this opportunity to pick her up in his arms and carry her across to the bed, he dropped her the last 5 inches or so and she bounced and rolled catching him by the sleeve and pulling him down on the bed. It didn't take her long to strip his clothes off. Just before he stopped thinking at all AJ wondered if Owen would mind one little white lie.


	2. Chapter 2

Sunday Day 2

It was 0700 the next morning when the shrill ring of his cell phone awakened him. AJ had to search for his pants which had been hastily kicked aside. Joey pulled the covers over her head as the phone continued to peel. Finally he retrieved the phone from his pocket and flipped it open.

"Chedwiggen." He answered.

AJ stepped into the kitchen and pulled the bedroom door closed behind him with a thud. The call didn't last very long. AJ sighed and snapped the phone closed. Of all the things he had in mind for today, meeting with the Secretary of the Navy wasn't one of them. He shoved open the door. Joey was doing an excellent impression of being asleep, so he walked to the side where she lay and flipped back the covers leaving her bare and kissed the back of her neck until she shivered. "I missed you," he said. She mumbled something in response. He covered her up and got dressed. Home, shower, uniform of the day and to the Pentagon for a 0900 briefing; he didn't have a moment to spare, but he was having trouble caring.

AJ settled into the chair in front of the Secretary's desk. A uniformed Navy lieutenant set a cup of coffee in front of him. Moments later the Secretary strode into the office. They shook hands briefly and the Sec. Nav. handed over a file. AJ skimmed the report. Two pilots, two RIOs and two F18's with orders for a strike inside a newly reorganized zone in Iraq came under fire from unknown sources. Both air crews crashed in an area controlled by allied ground forces. There were casualties on the ground. Numbers unknown at present. Plane crew presumed KIA.

AJ looked up. The Sec Nav, leaned forward in his chair and laced his fingers together. "What that doesn't say is that the Captain of the Patrick Henry is holding the acting Jag responsible for these deaths. He handled the rules of engagement briefing and provided the new maps with the reorganized strike and no fly zones." AJ nodded.

"Where is the Commander now, sir?" Chedwiggen asked.

"The Commander has been relived of duty and is being transported under guard to the brig. Captain Morris said that feeling was running high on the boat and he wanted him off a-sap. I approved the transfer at 0300."

"I see." Chedwiggen responded.

"This situation is under media blackout at the present time, but there are unconfirmed reports that one of the dead on the ground was a European journalist who had been imbedded with British forces. I'm sure I don't need to tell you AJ, but we need the facts and then we need a speedy trial, because this is going to lead the news here and abroad."

"Yes sir."

Sunday mornings at Jag Ops were typically quiet, but one call to his aide, PO Jennifer Coates had changed that. When the Admiral arrived, there were personnel at some of the duty stations in the bull pen and Colonel Mackenzie's office door was ajar, although she wasn't in view. Knowing the Colonel, she was likely supervising the coffee maker. When AJ reached his office, Jennifer took his overcoat and cover and hung them on the rack in his office and then stood at attention in front of his desk.

"At ease." he said setting his briefcase on the desk.

"Colonel Mackenzie is in the office sir. Commanders Turner and Roberts are en route."

"Very good." He responded. "Let me know when Turner and Roberts get here."

"Yes, sir."

"Prepare orders for Colonel Mackenzie and Lieutenant Paulsen to proceed to the Patrick Henry to conduct a jag man investigation."

"When is the earliest they'll be available to travel, sir?"

AJ glanced at his watch. "1400 hours today."

"Yes, sir."

"Put through a call to Captain Simpson in London. I need recommendations for an 04 or 05 out of Europe to go TAD to the Patrick Henry a-sap to replace their Jag."

"Yes, sir." Coates responded. The worst part of being the Admiral's aide was that she often knew things before she could talk about them or just as often she didn't know what was going on, but had to follow orders anyway. The later was the case today. All she'd managed to glean so far was that something big had happened to the Jag on the Henry.

"Dismissed." The Admiral replied.

Five minutes later, Jennifer brought him a cup of coffee and set it on the corner of his desk. He glanced at her. "The Commanders have arrived sir."

"Get them in here and Colonel Mackenzie too."

"Yes sir."

A few minutes later, Colonel Sarah Mackenzie, Commander Bud Roberts, and Commander Sturgis Turner were seated in front of the Admiral's desk.

AJ flipped open the file and began to paraphrase the report he had nearly memorized. "Yesterday the JAG aboard the Seahawk assisted with a mission briefing. He reviewed new rules of engagement specific to a mission over Iraq and pinpointed new areas of no fly. This mission was flown yesterday evening local time. The planes were shot down before they reached their targets. They did not anticipate problems in the area they were over flying nor did they take appropriate evasive actions. They are presumed dead. The resulting crash resulted in a number of fatalities on the ground, primarily British troops. The Captain of the Patrick Henry," Here AJ paused and flipped two pages of the file, "Captain Morrisette alleges that the JAG misinterpreted the rules of engagement and he used an out of date map to pin point certain mission specific locations, as relating to the ROE and the no fly." AJ looked across the desk at the staff. It was Roberts who caught the anomaly.

"Sir?" Commander Roberts asked.

"Yes Commander."

"You said he, Sir."

"Yes, Mr. Roberts, I did."

"Sir the shipboard JAG is Lieutenant Karen Bricklin."

"Yes" Admiral Chedwiggen responded. "That brings me to the other matter which we need to address. Yesterday morning , I gave Commander Rabb permission to relieve Lt. Bricklin of her duties until his investigation into the charges against her is complete. At the time of the incident, Commander Rabb was the acting Jag on the Patrick Henry."

Admiral Chedwiggen closed the file on the desk in front of him and leaned forward. "The Commander is in transit and will arrive at the brig sometime later today. His replacement will be detailed later today. Colonel Mackenzie, you'll leave immediately for the Patrick Henry. Complete the investigation of the charges against Lt. Bricklin and concurrently begin a jag - man investigation into Commander Rabb's role in this situation. Take Lt. Paulsen with you. Coates should have your orders and travel arrangements within the hour."

Colonel Mackenzie paled slightly as she processed the gravity of the situation, but she maintained her professional demeanour, and managed a calm "Yes, sir." as Chedwiggen reviewed her orders.

"Commander Turner," Chedwiggen continued "should it be necessary, I expect you'll defend Commander Rabb. Keep me posted on his arrival at the brig."

"Commander Roberts make yourself available to the Colonel. She will need to shift some of her assigned cases to your desk, in order to proceed with these investigations."

"Yes, sir." Roberts responded.

Admiral Chedwiggen pushed back his chair and stood. His staff did like wise.

"Dismissed."

Mackenzie and Turner were out the door, before Commander Roberts turned back and spoke to the Admiral.

"Sir, I'd like to assist Commander Turner at trial."

"Well Mr. Roberts," Admiral Chedwiggen replied, "I appreciate your loyalty, unfortunately, I expect you'll be busy helping the Colonel prosecute him." Bud swallowed hard.

"Yes sir." Roberts turned and stepped out of the office. The Admiral followed him as far as the door. When she saw Chedwiggen, Coates stood, gathered telephone messages and a file containing drafts of the orders and itinerary for the Admiral's approval. She handed him the documents. He eyed the messages and then turned back into to his office and closed his door without slamming it. Almost.

Admiral Chedwiggen finally secured for the day a little after 1600. Colonel Mackenzie and Lt. Paulsen were en route to the Patrick Henry. Captain Simpson had recommended an 04 named Martenez to handle Jag Ops aboard the Patrick Henry in Bricklin's absence. And Commander Rabb's transport was due to touch down before 1800. Not for the first time as he locked his door, AJ wondered what use Seal training and a law degree were for this billet; better to have a politician for a mother and a file clerk for a father.

He rang Joey's home number once he got into the truck, and wasn't entirely surprised when he got her machine. He tried her cell phone, but was shuttled directly to voice mail. Short of patience he disconnected without leaving any message.


	3. Chapter 3

Wednesday - Day 5

It was Wednesday before there was any useful information from the Henry.

"What have you got Colonel," Admiral Chedwiggen spoke into the phone.

"Sir, we have reviewed Commander Rabb's findings and concluded his investigation into the charges against Lt. Bricklin. We agree with his findings that there is sufficient evidence to go to trial with the charges of dereliction of duty."

"I'll see your report by the end of the day."

"Yes sir."

"What about the other incident?"

"Well sir, as you can imagine there is lots of speculation right now. However we have been able to ascertain that the information the Commander used was prepared with the assistance of Lt. Bricklin."

"What's next Colonel?"

"We're going over the communication logs from the AWACs and the ship's com logs. We're also examining the mechanics logs and reviewing the personnel records of the pilots and Rios."

"Very well. I'll expect a preliminary report tomorrow."

Commander Roberts knocked on Commander Turner's office door. "Come on in Bud."

"How is Commander Rabb, Sir?"

"He's keeping it together Bud."

Bud nodded. "I'd like to go see him. Harriet wanted to go yesterday, but I told her it wasn't appropriate."

Sturgis nodded, closing the file on his desk slowly. "It's probably wise to stay away at least until the investigation is finished and the charge sheet is complete."

Bud tilted his head slightly. "Are you expecting more charges Commander?"

"Until the investigation is complete, I don't know what we're dealing with. Both Admiral Chedwiggen and the convening authority have to review the charges. If they're deemed appropriate then I guess we'll see you and the Colonel in court."


	4. Chapter 4

Saturday Day 8

Colonel Sarah Mackenzie dropped her bag on the floor and turned the deadbolt to lock her door. She was exhausted and it wasn't entirely from the round trip to the boat. It was the constant turmoil. Wondering if the next piece of evidence, witness statement, or com log would effectively kill Harm's career and if he would forever hold her responsible. She didn't believe for a moment that he was guilty of anything. He was careful, logical, responsible and held the safety of the pilots paramount, but the evidence was telling a different story.

Nothing about this situation made any sense. She was hoping there would be clarity of thought when she and Bud reviewed the evidence before she submitted her final report. Thankfully there was a couple of nights sleep in her own bed before that happened and a day to catch up on laundry and throw out a week's worth of fresh produce and milk. She stood at the fridge door and reviewed the contents. There was a withered apple which should have been tossed last week, half a carton of milk with a best before date three days ago and something that looked like turkey oozing around it's plastic container. She closed the door and decided the fridge could wait. She plugged in the kettle and while the water heated, emptied her bag and changed her clothes. Thirty minutes later, fresher from the shower, she plugged the kettle in again and hit the play button on her machine.

Harm's voice shook the cobwebs out of her head. "Mac, I've been trying to reach my mom. Can you call her and let her know what's up? This is going to be all over the news and she deserves to hear from someone she knows. Thanks Mac." There was a pause. Then barely audible, "What would I do without you?" Then a click as the line disconnected.

Mac sunk to her knees and lowered her head. She knew it was lack of sleep from the last few days. She was light headed and her stomach was doing manoeuvres like the last time she flew with Harm. That was Paraguay, when he'd done his knight in shining armour trick and come to her rescue. Damn the torpedoes full speed ahead.

And now she had dug up just enough evidence to skin him of his future, his livelihood as a lawyer, his good name and very likely his freedom. He wouldn't feel the same about her after she gutted his career in court. No way the convening authority would allow a plea in this case, not with the loss of lives involved.

She shook her head slowly, breathing in through her nose and nosily out through her mouth. It was the feeling of nausea that prickled in her brain. It was that feeling that made the remembered taste of bourbon waft over her tongue. She stood on shaky knees and poured the steaming water over the bag in the cup. With careful fingers she plucked the bag out the cup a moment later and tossed it into the sink. She wrapped her hands around the mug and breathed in the tea, but it couldn't erase the echo of liquor from her mind. She picked up the cordless phone and settled into the arm chair in the living room

Joey picked up the call on the second ring.

"Hi Joe."

"Mac you're home."

"Did you hear?"

"About Harm you mean?"

"Yeah, actually I went to see him Thursday after work."

"Really, I'm surprised the Admiral okayed that."

"Mac I didn't run it up the chain of command. I just went to see a friend who's in a spot of trouble."

"Right. Sometimes I forget you're not one of us."

"You sound tired."

"Beat. Too tired to do laundry or go grocery shopping and not tired enough for bed. Wanna come over and tell me exciting stories from your life that don't have anything to do with the Navy?"

"How about I pick you up in 45 and we go out to my sister's place and take Kyle to the park."

"Sure, another great way for me to meet a guy, go to the park with a kid and another woman."

Joey laughed, "See you're gonna be just fine. Besides you've got a guy, he's a felon, but he's all yours."

"Let's not talk about that today, OK."

"Deal, see in you in 45."

Mac touched the talk button to end the call, then struggled out of the chair and went back into the kitchen. In her address book under Rabb, H. she found Trish and Frank Burnett's number in California. She did the time difference in her head and dialled the numbers.

The call went just about the way she expected. Trish was warm and concerned, until she discovered that Mac had not only led the investigation, but had been detailed as the lead prosecutor in his case. Her tone turned frosty and terse. Mac set the phone down gently and took a long swig of cold bitter tea from the mug in her hand. Get used to it Mackenzie, she thought. She's not the only Rabb who's going to be mad at you.

Side by side on the swings at the tot lot four blocks from Joey's sister's house, Mac began the interrogation. "So how did your TAD assignment go?"

Joey shrugged. "No problem while I was there."

"But?" asked Mac.

"Commander Stewart, my C.O., bought me a beer Monday night after I got back. I was TAD for a couple weeks. Anyway he buys me a beer and proceeds to tell me not to hold my breath when the promotions board meets next month, because my name is not on the list. So I play dumb and ask him why not. I've got good fit reps and I've been a Lieutenant Commander the requisite number of months. What's up?' Joey shifted Kyle to her other knee and pushed off again. Mac planted her feet on the ground and twisted sideways to watch Joey as she explained.

"He says that the promotion board won't touch me because of my personal life. Now I'm thinking, he thinks, that they think, I'm gay. But of course the real problem is that I've got a two star on speed dial and a steady date for Friday night."

Mac shook her head sympathetically.

'So I pointed out to him that I hadn't done anything that was inappropriate. And he said his hands were tied, that this wasn't a discussion it was a briefing, and that if the scuttlebutt he was hearing was correct I could expect a phone call from my detailer offering me a new post."

"What did the Admiral say when you told him?" Mac responded

Joey shook her head and repositioned Kyle. "I haven't. All he could say is I told you so. We knew from the beginning this might happen."

"Jeez Joey, I'm sorry."

"Yeah That's what that crafty bastard Stewart said."

"Bastard." said Kyle mimicking his aunt in a clear sweet voice. Joey's eyes went wide and Mac turned her head so he wouldn't see her laugh.

Sturgis Turner finished his run a little after 1730. He liked the way his body took over his mind during his long runs on the weekend. After the first couple of miles he ceased to think and just ran feeling only the physical sensations. Unfortunately, life crowded right back in once his breathing and heart rate returned to normal. The sound of his cell phone ringing brought him back to reality a little faster than usual.

"Hello" he said.

"Hi Sturgis"

"Hey Mac, what's up"

"I wondered when you'd talked to Harm last."

"Just a minute ok."

He set the phone down and went into the steamy bathroom to turn off the shower. He grabbed the towel from the bar and ran it across his face and neck and rustled it through his hair. Breathing a little easier and no longer dripping with sweat he picked up the phone again.

"I saw Harm last night during visiting hours."

"Come on Sturgis."

"Mac you're prosecuting him."

"Yeah and I'd like to know how he's doing."

"Well to be honest, brig chow isn't up to his standards and his bunk is too short. He says its like sea duty without the view."

Mac laughed in spite of herself. Then more seriously she said, "I'd like to go visit him, but I guess I'll have to wait until we meet next week."

"I'm not enjoying myself either, but it's a job."

"Thanks Sturgis, see you Monday."


	5. Chapter 5

Tuesday Day 11

For Mac, for Sturgis, for Bud , for AJ and especially for Harm, the next week began exactly as expected. To save Harm some face, Sturgis arranged for Mac to interview his client at the brig rather than in a conference room at JAG Ops. It wasn't much really, but Sturgis couldn't imagine how it would make his old friend feel to have to return to JAG in handcuffs and shackles under armed guard. It would be bad enough to have to be interviewed in the brig.

Mac to her credit readily agreed to the change of venue, but she pulled no punches during the interview. She walked Harm through his evidence without any hint of emotion. Sturgis was impressed with her dispassionate lawyer-ing. After Bud and Mac left, Harm turned to Sturgis.

"Can you keep an eye on her Sturgis?"

"With respect to what exactly? She doesn't play dirty."

"I don't mean the case." Harm looked down at the scared laminate top of the table. "She's blaming herself for this. Remind her that she has a job to do. Tell her," Harm paused thinking "Tell her that reports of my death are greatly exaggerated." and he grinned.

Sturgis nodded promising to relay the message. When they shook hands a few minutes later, Harm reminded him of the promise.

"I got it man, I'll talk to her."

"Today, Sturgis, please."

When he got back to his desk, Sturgis unloaded his briefcase, made some notes in the case file and then went looking for Mac. She was standing beside the coffee pot watching the black liquid drip into the pot. Her mug was ready. By the looks of the coffee, and the quantity of sugar and cream in her waiting mug, she was attempting to restart her heart. Sturgis said as much.

"Maybe you should go home and try to get some rest."

Mac looked at him and shrugged. "I can close my eyes but sleeping the last couple of weeks seems optional."

"You know all he does is put you through hell. Maybe it's time to move on."

"Yeah well easier said than done Sturgis."

"He gave me a message for you." Mac looked at him and nodded. Sturgis continued.

"He said this isn't your fault, He said that you have a job to do." Mac nodded. "He also said that reports of his death are greatly exaggerated."

"He said what?"

"He said that reports of his death are greatly exaggerated."

"What did he mean?"

"I don't know Mac."


	6. Chapter 6

Thursday Day 13

"Shit" Mac sat up in bed. The room was fully dark. There was a glow from the street lights sneaking around the window blind. She flung back the covers. Her internal clock registered 11:06 pm. She wasn't positive, but she thought perhaps she'd actually been asleep. But she wasn't sleeping now. She knew what Harm meant. There was only one person whose death report had been exaggerated. She flicked on the light on the table beside the bed , stood, pulled the bed together, ran a brush through her hair and got dressed. In forty seven minutes she was pounding on Webb's door. To her surprise, he answered it.

"Sarah. What are you doing here? Do you have any idea what time it is?" Webb looked like he hadn't had much more rest than she had.

She pushed past him into the apartment. It was clear from the place that he was entertaining. There was a bottle and wine glasses on the coffee table. Looking at him she could see a rosy smear near his ear; lipstick she guessed. His shirt and trousers were rumpled. She felt a twinge of remorse for the times she'd shared his bed and hated him.

"Is she still here?"

"Sarah, we've been over for months. What I do and with whom is none of your."

She interrupted him grabbing him tightly by the arm. "I don't care what you're doing. I want to talk about Harm and I assume that's not a conversation you want to have with your latest sideline in the place."

He pulled away and stepped back. "I don't have anything to say to you about Rabb." There was an edge to his voice.

She matched his tone. "I'm not leaving until you tell it all."

"It's classified."

"I have clearance."

"Not to hear this."

"Then just tell me how it ends so I can help Harm."

Special Agent Clayton Webb eyed her carefully. Mac's face was a mask of Marine duty, determination and loyalty. Getting rid of her without some sort of explanation or an argument would be impossible. She was a pain in the butt. He shook his head slowly.

"Go put the coffee on, I'll go say good bye to my company."

Mac waited in the kitchen. She heard the door to the apartment close with a thump. A few moments later, Clay came into the kitchen. He carried a short dark bottle. His left cheek wore a hand shaped red welt. He looked at Mac and she looked at him, but kept quiet. He opened the cupboard over the sink, retrieved a tumbler and poured two inches from the bottle into the bottom. He took a long sip then inclined his head toward the door. "Lets go sit in the living room. This might take awhile."

"This isn't my operation," Clay said "I know some of the players and some of the intel, because they brought me in to consult early on. "

'They?" Mac said.

"The company. Look this play started eight maybe nine months ago." Webb stood up and paced the length of the room. She watched him. "I shouldn't tell you any of this. I don't have the clearances to tell you and you sure as hell don't have them to hear it." Mac let him be. She knew he was finding a way to rationalize what he was about to tell her. Finally he sat back down.

"I'll tell you what pertains directly to Rabb."

"OK" she responded. It took him a few minutes to lay it out. It wasn't all that complicated, but Mac had questions.

"How much of what you've told me does Admiral Chedwiggen know?"

"I don't think he knows that Rabb's current situation is part of a company run operation. "Webb leaned forward in his chair and rested his elbows on his knees. "But he does know that Rabb's involvement with the company never ended. That was made clear to him when Rabb returned to JAG."

"I understand that the com logs, and personnel files were all faked but what about the crash. Someone shot that video, someone was in those planes."

"I don't know. But it wouldn't be the first time that the company used movie magic to produce video footage . The clip I saw on ZNN was only half a minute long."

Mac nodded. "So if you had to guess, where are the planes, pilots and Rios that left the Henry after Harm's briefing."

"I imagine they've arrived at their destination and are awaiting go orders so they can complete their mission." Clay yawned noisily. He couldn't remember what he saw in her.

"What about Harm? How does this end for him? Is he going to trial and then to prison to protect a clandestine CIA operation?"

"I don't know Sarah. He wouldn't be the first. He's closer to the inside than I am. What's he saying?"

She remembered Sturgis' message. "OK" she said. "I'll likely have more questions, but for now that's enough."

"Glad to be of service." Clay stood up and walked her to the door.

He had his hand on the knob when he paused and looked at her. "Do you miss us, Sarah?"

"Yeah, Clay, all the time."

He nodded. "Me too." He pulled the door open and shut it quietly behind her.


	7. Chapter 7

Friday Day 14

Mac arrived at the office just before 0800. While the coffee dripped into the pot, she reviewed what she knew. Clay had told a terrific story, but she wasn't certain what if any of it was fact and what was fairy tale. With Clay it could easily go either way. She was required to disclose evidence to the defence, but a late night conversation with her ex boyfriend based on a hunch was hardly evidence. She debated asking the Admiral to reopen the investigation. If she kicked over enough stones, she might find actual evidence of a cover up. But that might put Harm in jeopardy as well as the pilots, Rios, and their real mission. She was in over her head. She picked up the phone.

"Good morning, Coates. I need to see the Admiral."

When she entered his office, he let her stand at attention for seven minutes before he acknowledged her. He was hunched over a thick file on his desk. Finally he swept it closed and looked up at her.

"At ease, Colonel, have a seat."

"Sir I had a conversation last night with Clayton Webb that leads me to believe that Commander Rabb's situation is." Here she lost her train of thought.

"Colonel?"

"Yes sir. I'm not sure what to believe, but it appears that the Commander's situation is being used to deflect attention from a CIA operation."

"And this affects the charges against Rabb how?"

"Well sir, if the planes didn't crash, then, well sir then the charges should be dropped."

"I saw the video clip on the news Colonel. It certainly looked to me like those planes crashed."

"I know sir, but what if?"

"Colonel." The Admiral's already thin patience was worn through. The tone of his voice betrayed his frustration. "Prosecute the case on the evidence. If the evidence turns out to be faulty, at some point, the case can be retried or the verdict over turned."

"Yes, sir." The Admiral looked at the Colonel and recognized both her fear and weariness.

"Colonel, I understand your concern for Commander Rabb, but this is his mess and it's Turner's job, not yours to dig him out."

"Yes sir."

"Dismissed." The door closed quietly. AJ stood and surveyed the view from his office windows. He was disturbed by the Colonel's accusations. It was the CIA's on going interest in Rabb that had made AJ more than reluctant to reinstate him at JAG after Paraguay. AJ shook his head in frustration. Rabb was trouble enough with out a company collar around his neck, or maybe this time it was a noose. Neither visual gave the Admiral much comfort.

AJ was in the kitchen when Joey rang the bell on the front door promptly at 1900 hours. Dammit beat him to the door, practically bowling Joey over once the door was open. Joey bent down and gave the excited dog the attention she wanted. AJ stood one hand on the door shaking his head slowly. When Joey finally straightened, AJ got a peck on the cheek. He closed the door without a word and helped her with her coat.

In the kitchen, she opened the wine she'd brought and poured two glasses. He slide the casserole dish into the oven and set the timer on the stove. Picking up his glass, he followed her back into the living room. AJ sat on one end of the couch and Joey sat on the other. He lay one arm across the back and she turned sideways, tucking her feet up.

She sipped her wine and closed her eyes. AJ looked at her thoughtfully, then broke the silence. "I had a look at the promotions list this week."

"I hear my name's not on it."

"No, maybe next time."

Joey grimaced. "Actually the impression I got was that hell will freeze over first."

AJ set his glass on the table. "What?"

"I had a conversation with my CO last week. He told me my name wasn't on the list and he did me the courtesy of telling me why." She studied the red liquid swirling in her glass.

"Why?"

"He said it was because of my inappropriate relationship with you."

"Those his words?" AJ asked. She nodded.

"Son of a." AJ stood up. "When did he tell you this?"

Joey turned and put her feet on the floor. "We had a drink after I got back last week."

AJ shook his head. "He kept it out of the office, so he could deny it."

"This isn't his fault, AJ. We've known all along that there might be negative ramifications. And we haven't exactly been quiet about our relationship."

"I'll resign." AJ was looking towards the fireplace.

"No way."

"I said I would."

"You can't save me from this. It's all ready happened."

"If I resign, they have nothing to hold against you. They can put your name on the next list for consideration." There was a long moment where no one said anything. AJ sat down on the couch and put his arm around her shoulder. Joey sighed and leaned back. When she spoke, her voice was still and without emotion.

"I got a call from my detailer. I'm going to be offered a new billet."

"When did this happen?"

"Wednesday."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

'I'm telling you now." There was a sharpness to her voice. "He said he'd confirm the details next week, but it sounds like I'll be relief support for shipboard payroll personnel. I'll be permanent TAD on anything that floats, out of some backwater naval station."

"Refuse the transfer."

Joey shrugged her shoulders. "This might be the best offer I get for awhile AJ." AJ's arm slipped from her shoulder. She was paying the price for his happiness. It was unfathomable.

"No damn way. We have to fight this Joey." He was on his feet now, pacing and then turning to look at her. "You have to refuse the transfer. I'll speak to the Sec. Nav. We'll get this sorted out."

"AJ this is exactly why they're transferring me. They already think we've done something improper." She was on her feet now facing him. "Don't you get it? If you get involved now they'll absolutely be able to charge you with undue command influence and conduct unbecoming and probably throw in fraternization for good measure."

He took a step toward her. "Joey." He said softly.

She took a step back "It's too late AJ. Don't resign on account of me, it's too late to do any good." She turned then, shoved her arms into her coat and pushed her feet into her shoes. AJ didn't turn until he heard the front door close with a quiet click. Then he sat woodenly on the couch until the timer on stove began to ping relentlessly.


	8. Chapter 8

Sunday Day 16

When all of his calls to her home number and cell went unanswered Saturday and Sunday, AJ drove to her apartment building late Sunday afternoon. He used his key and let himself into the building, but knocked on her door when he got there.

She had obviously eyed him through the peep hole, because the door opened only a crack. "I want your keys." She said.

"Let me in." He said. "So we can talk."

"Keys." She said holding out her hand palm up. He set the ring on her hand.

"Please Joey" He said.

"Go away AJ. It's over." She replied. She closed the door then and he stood in the hallway until he heard the deadbolt on the other side slide into place.

Tuesday Day 18

Mac found herself in the coffee room with Admiral Chedwiggen shortly after 0700. She had been oblivious to much of what had happened in the office in the past three weeks, but she had an awakening realization that there was something amiss between Joey and AJ. Joey had mentioned that she was expecting a new billet, but hadn't made any further comment or explanation in the phone call they'd shared over the weekend. The Admiral for his part was more than usually terse in his instructions and observations at the weekly senior staff meeting the previous morning. He was pouring his own cup of coffee when she came in and set her cup on the counter.

When he waved the pot at her cup, she nodded "Yes please, sir."

He set the pot back on the burner and picked up his cup. He was standing in the doorway when she turned around.

"Sir is everything ok?"

"Joey," he said turning towards her. "What in God's name do I do about Joey?"

"Do you mean the transfer, sir?"

"It's my fault. I pushed her into this situation. This could hang over her for years. It's my fault."

"I imagine she's devastated, sir." Was Mac's only comment.

"I really screwed it up." He shook his head. "We pretended it wouldn't matter. I should have known better." He rubbed the tense muscles in his neck and focused on the floor.

"Sir what do you think she's upset about?" AJ's brow crinkled and his expression hardened. "Do you think she's more concerned that her career is suffering or that she's going to lose you regardless of what she does?"

"What did you say?"

"Her career is going to suffer temporarily sir, but she's losing you permanently."

He opened his mouth to reply, but he couldn't imagine what he might say. Finally he turned and stomped back into his office. He shut the door with a bang heard all the way to the elevators.


	9. Chapter 9

Thursday Day 27

Petty Officer Jennifer Coates hit the intercom button on her desk. "Admiral, Secretary of the Navy on line 3."

"Thank you Coates."

When the flashing light on her board glowed yellow she turned her attention to the document she was editing. It wasn't more than two minutes later when she heard the Admiral swear and then the loud thump of something heavy landing on the floor. Startled and concerned, she knocked and opened his office door. The Admiral was picking up his desk chair. He turned to her as he set the heavy swivel chair back on its rollers. "Where are Mackenzie and Turner?"

"The Commander is in court until noon recess and I believe the Colonel is in the law library, Sir."

"I want to see them as soon as the Commander is finished in court."

"Yes sir."

When they were standing at attention in front of his desk, Chedwiggen relayed the news. "All the charges against Commander Rabb are being dropped by the convening authority. I am expecting a fax to that effect from Captain Morrisette within the hour. Commander Turner please contact the CO at the brig and advise him that the release documentation is imminent. I want Rabb out today. Make sure all the documentation is completed so that there won't be any delay from this office."

"Understood, sir." Commander Turner responded.

"Colonel, please box all the files pertaining to this case. Seal them under your supervision and bring them to this office before you secure for the evening."

"Yes sir."

Once they were dismissed, Turner asked Mac the question they were both thinking. "What just happened?"

"I don't know." Mac replied "But it looks like Harm just got a get out of jail free card."

Mac hadn't made much progress when she saw Turner less than five minutes later. She was organizing the files on her desk when he knocked on the open door. "Come on , we need to go back and see the Admiral."

She set the file down she was holding and pulled her door shut behind her. Turner was already at the door way to PO Coates' desk. She walked quickly and caught up just as Turner went back into the Admiral's office.

"What is it?" Admiral Chedwiggen asked.

"Sir, I spoke to the CO at the brig." Turner said. "He advised me that Commander Rabb was transferred to sick bay approximately 90 minutes ago as a result of an altercation in the exercise yard. After a brief exam he was transferred by road ambulance to Bethesda where he is undergoing surgical repairs for a knife wound to his shoulder."

The room was very quiet. Admiral Chedwiggen's face was hard and angry. Finally he broke the silence. "Stay on top his condition, Commander, I want a report before you secure for the day. "

"Yes sir."

"Dismissed."

When the door closed, AJ swore quietly. He paced back and forth in front of his desk. From the corner of his eye he caught his reflection in the TV screen. Looking at the hazy likeness, his rank insignia and medals caught his attention. He wasn't a politician, he was two star admiral with medals from campaigns spanning 30 years. He was a Navy Seal, fit and courageous. He was the Judge Advocate for the Navy. He wasn't a puppet. Sitting behind this desk had been a difficult billet. His staff were lawyers, but even so he'd sent them into danger time and again without leading them or accompanying them. He had no legal achievements, only political ones. It wasn't enough. This go around with Rabb made that clear. This was the moment he'd been postponing. He pushed the intercom button. "Coates "

"Yes sir." she responded

"I need fifteen minutes with the Secretary Monday. Make the appointment then come in. I have a letter to dictate."

He dictated the letter without a second thought. It was clear and it was to the point. If there were explanations necessary, he'd make them verbally. He swore Coates to secrecy. He told her that she was not to divulge the contents, of the letter to anyone. If he found it leaked, he promised her, he'd see her court marshalled. She was suitably chastened.

Coates secured for the day after the two copies of the letter were typed and signed and her dictation copy put into the burn bag. Mackenzie trailed in with a petty officer and three cartons. Rear Admiral AJ Chedwiggen put on his overcoat, handled his cover and briefcase and was nearly half way home before he thought about Joey.


	10. Chapter 10

Saturday Day 29

Harm was pale and still when Mac pushed open the door to his hospital room a little after 1000 Saturday . He turned his head towards her at the sound of the door and gave her a brilliant smile. She came in and laid a warm hand on his shoulder and bent over and kissed his cheek. He was startled by the gesture, but pleased she'd chanced it.

"How are you feeling?"

"Well this place isn't much better than the brig to be honest, but" he nodded at the door way "I get a way better class of visitors."

She slipped out of her jacket and hung it over the back of the a solid metal chair with a padded back and seat. Then she opened the bag she'd carried in and brought out the treasures she'd brought. "I brought mail" she said. I took the liberty of bringing only the magazines and personal correspondence, I thought the bills could wait a few more days."

"That depends," Harm chuckled and winced "Was the power still on at my place."

"Yeah the lights were still on and there was no eviction notice."

Harm took the stack from her and flipped though it one handed. There were 4 pale green square envelopes addressed in a familiar hand. He pulled one out and waved it at her as she scooted the chair a little closer to the bed.

"What's this?"

"It's old fashioned I know, but you were a little out of touch for a while and there were a few things I needed to get off my chest."

Harm shook his head and made to open the one he held. She put his hand over his. 'Not yet OK."

"OK"

Mac spent all that remained of the day in Harm's hospital room. She was so pleased that the embargo had been lifted from their friendship that she had arrived as soon as visiting time permitted and left only when he had other company or fell asleep.

At 2205 hours, Lieutenant Yeo came in. She gave Harm a fresh carafe of water, adjusted his blankets and eyed Mac's dozing figure curled up beside him on the cot with a wry smile. She turned the lights off when she left and hoped she wouldn't catch hell from the senior duty nurse. Awakened by the intrusion, Harm lay still listening to Mac's even breathing. They'd slept together in lots of places under lots of circumstances over the years. He wondered not for the first time, what it might be like to take her to bed. He thought of the letters then and so with his free hand he managed to turn on the bedside light and snag open the first of the 4 letters. None were very long but it was clear to him at least that she was finally willing after everything to let him into her life. The first one began:

"What the hell, Harm? I can't believe any of this is true and I can't believe I'm supposed to prosecute you. I've wasted so much time on regret and anger. Do you suppose we'll get one more chance?" M

"PS I called your mom and now she's as ticked at me as you're going to be when I see you in court."

The second one referred to her conversation with Webb.

"I saw Clay last night. What do I do next?"

M

"PS I can't remember why I dated him. What was I thinking?"

The next one he read said:

"Harm I hate this. I've picked up the phone three times today to dial your number. The case prep is stalled, we're waiting for some misfiled records to surface and the Admiral is breathing down my neck. I keep thinking if I could just talk with you face to face, I could sort this out."

M

"PS What I wouldn't give for an evening of Meatless Meatloaf now."

And finally:

"Harm

I can't figure out how to get the charges dropped. I've tried to pump Sturgis for hints, but either you're not telling him anything or he's being obtuse. Clay's not answering my phone calls."

M

"PS Have you given up on me?"

Harm snapped off the light, then took the sheets of paper and their envelopes and jammed them into the drawer in the bedside table. The motion gave him a painful jab in his shoulder that made him gasp and moan. The noise startled Mac. She lifted her head. It took her a moment to remember where she was but once she was oriented she nearly fell out of bed in her rush to extricate herself.

"What the hell?" She whispered through clenched teeth.

Harm chuckled. "You were sitting on the bed reading to me after supper and then you fell asleep. I dodged the book when you dropped it but I managed to catch you as you keeled over."

"Sorry Harm."

"When was the last time you had a night's sleep?"

"The night before you went to the Henry I think."

"Yeah me too."

"I've gotta get out of here." She was tiptoeing around in the dark trying to find and slip on her shoes without making any more noise.

She had her coat on and her purse slung over her shoulder when she came back to his bedside. "The letters" she said, "where are the letters?"

"In a safe place. "

"I want them back," she said.

"Why?"

"It doesn't matter. You're safe now."

"You can trust me with what you wrote Mac." He reached up and brushed the hair back from her face. " I trusted you with my life. You haven't let me down yet and I won't let you down."

"You read them."

"While you were asleep."

"Oh."

She took half a step back trying to remember what she'd said, but all she could remember was the pain of losing touch with him and the fear that bolted through her when she realized it might be permanent. He wrapped his big hand around her forearm and drew her back to the bed, back towards him.

"Kiss me goodnight" he said.

She leaned in aiming for his cheek and he caught her full on the mouth. It wasn't half long enough but she got the message loud and clear. The past was in the past and the future was full of possibilities.


	11. Chapter 11

Sunday Day 30

Joey was sitting beside Harm's cot Sunday afternoon. She was washing his face. In typical hospital fashion, lunch for invalids with arms in slings had been spaghetti in a runny tomato sauce. Harm declared it nearly eatable, Mac looked at it with the disgust she usually reserved for Harm's meatless meatloaf and Joey did the only sensible thing. She fed it bite by bite to Harm like she fed her nephew Kyle, and wiped his face clean after.

There was a knock on the door just as she finished. Admiral Chedwiggen was dressed in his casual best, black leather bomber jacket over dark brown cords and a fine knit turtle neck in a sand colour. Joey wiped damp palms on her jeans and swallowed hard. "See you soon, Sailor." she said to Harm. She gave Mac a weak smile and nodded to the Admiral as she left the room.

"I think it must be lunch time." Mac said. "I'll go see what they're serving carnivores in the cafeteria." Harm grinned and gave her a wink. The Admiral settled into Joey's chair.

Mac took long strides toward the elevator catching up to Joey just as the door slid open. "What's up?"

"Time for me to be going."

"Come have lunch with me."

"Mac, I don't want to talk about this."

"Fine we'll talk about my love life instead." Joey rolled her eyes, but it was better than going home and stewing about new billets and Rear Admirals.

Mac ordered a cheese burger, French fries and a soda while Joey sipped a glass of tepid tap water and ate a watery iceberg lettuce salad, snagging the occasional fry off Mac's plate.

"Let me see if I understand ," Mac said. "You want your Navy career, and the Admiral too."

"I thought we weren't going to talk about this." Joey set down her fork.

"If you don't talk about it how in the world can you sort it out."

"Oh God there is nothing worse than a reformed drunk." Mac made a face and Joey shrugged. "Sorry bad example. But weren't you and Harm virtually mute on the subject of how much you loved one another up until yesterday?"

Mac shrugged her shoulders. "So now I finally know how it's done. I said some things. He said some things and we're finally headed in the same direction."

Joey shook her head. "No amount of chatter will change any of this. Whatever AJ and I have is over because like it or not, to preserve whatever I have left for a career, I'm moving on to a new billet."

"What's AJ think?"

"You know I think this blind sided him. He never thought our relationship would actually cause any trouble."

"So what will you do now?"

"Nothing." Joey took another sip of water. "I'm shipping out in 2 months to a new post. I might be able to resuscitate my career, but my life with AJ is dead."

Mac nodded. "And he agrees?"

Joey shook her head. "We haven't talked."

"Joey, you have to talk this through, you can't just walk away."

OK already, quit giving me advice and let's talk about your love life for a change.

"OK" Mac said with a brilliant grin, "Fire away."


	12. Chapter 12

Tuesday Day 32

After work, Sturgis drove to Bethesda loaded Harm into his car and took him first to his favourite vegetarian restaurant and then finally home. Harm opened the door to the fridge and blessed Mac's foresight, there was a little bit of everything to keep him through the next couple of days, even more than that there was beer and bottled water. He tossed Sturgis a cold can and took a bottle out for himself. They sat at the dining table.

"Glad to be home?" Sturgis asked.

"Yeah. I'll be glad to get back to work next week."

"At Jag or your other job."

Harm chuckled. "I think I'm through moonlighting."

Sturgis shrugged. "Well if I know you, you'll find some other cause to pursue."

Harm smiled. "I think I may have already found one."

"What?"

"How would you like to be best man at my wedding?"

"Wedding? Don't you have to date somebody before you marry them? I never saw anybody else's name but mine and Kershaw's on your visitor list at the brig." Sturgis eyes widened. "And Joey Cassidy. Man don't tell me you're involved with the Admiral's girlfriend."

"No pal. She couldn't come see me."

Sturgis set the beer can on the table and leaned in.

"Who? And why not?"

Harm shrugged. "Well it's not settled yet, so maybe I better not say anything else."

"No way Harm. If you're going to do something else to endanger your life or your career, as your lawyer, I think I have a right to know what you're planning."

There was a soft knock on Harm's door.

Harm grinned. "Saved by the bell, get that would you?"

Sturgis wasn't surprised when the visitor turned out to be Mac. He returned to the table, sipping the still full beer. She slipped off her jacket and set her purse on a chair before coming to rest a hand on Harm's shoulder. She kissed his cheek gently.

Sturgis shook his head. "Harm you've got to be kidding. You're going from the frying pan into the fire."

Harm shrugged his shoulder, wincing at the gesture. "We'll have to serve in different commands, but we'll work it out." He put his hand over Mac's still resting on his shoulder and gave it a quick squeeze.

"Sure" she said smiling.


	13. Chapter 13

Thursday Day 34

When Joey put the key in the lock she could hear her telephone ringing and then stop. She shuffled out of her shoes and coat and hung them up when the phone began to ring again. Her cell had died somewhere on the way home. She dropped it in the charger and picked up the phone on the counter. "Cassidy" she answered.

"If you don't have plans, I'd like to see you tonight."

"Oh, uh, AJ, I." She took a breath. "Look AJ I don't really think we need to see one another do we? We're both moving on, let's leave it at that."

"Please Joey, I don't think I've made myself entirely clear." She could hear the gentleness in his voice. He used his words and the strength of his delivery to underline his authority . He could be brutal without ever laying a hand on you. She'd witnessed his power first hand. But this was completely different. There was palpable grief behind the words.

It was all she could do to say "No" one more time and set the receiver back in the cradle. She stood for a long time with one handle on the phone. It took all her will to refuse him.

The lamp beside the sofa cast a warm glow on the book in his lap, while the light outside faded to black. It was a tale of two soldiers pursuing victory with grim determination, one Korean, and the other American. They fought the same battles in the same war and struggled with the same fears and challenges. But AJ wasn't reading the text anymore, instead he was moving about in his own past remembering his own battles. Finally he shook himself and set the book aside. He knew old soldiers who relished their past so much that they relinquished the present and abandoned the future. They preferred their war time compatriots to their wives, children and grandchildren. With his own retirement looming large, AJ was beginning to see the pitfalls. He could leave the Navy to recreate in his retirement half a lifetime of military service or he could use what time was left to find a new life.

He stood then, snapped off the light and moved through the darkened house. It was monument and testimony to a Navy life and the career of a man who had made few mistakes. It would be easy to cling to the safe path, to the old ways and to security of this house and these things. But security was for tiny babies and safety was for toddlers. He would retire a Rear Admiral with two stars and a chest full of medals, surely now was the time for action and for courage

He stripped to his boxers and climbed between the cool sheets. Once he was settled, the dog, Dammit eased her way on to a corner of the king sized bed and curled into a tight ball. AJ rolled on to his side and drifted to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Saturday Day 35

After a run with the dog, AJ filled a thermos with coffee, made three sandwiches and put the dog into the back of the truck. As he slammed the hatch, he came to a decision and made one more trip into the house. He kicked off his sneakers at the back door and took the stairs to his bedroom two at a time. He rummaged in the top drawer of the dresser for half a minute before wrapping a hand around the package. In the truck it took him forty five minutes, but he was at the ball diamond before Joey arrived. When she got there he helped her unload the gear and greet the kids and their folks. If she was surprised to see him, she didn't let on. The game, scheduled for ten a.m., started at ten after. He coached first base and earned his keep after the game, loading bases, bats, balls and helmets back into Joey's car. Parents nodded their thanks and the kids drifted away.

When it was just the two of them AJ and Joey sat on the bench behind the backstop at home plate. He poured hot coffee into her travel mug from the thermos and handed her one of the sandwiches. The other he dropped on the ground for the dog and ate the last one himself. Joey finally broke the silence.

"How would you like to take the team over when I go?" she asked between bites.

He shrugged and shook his head slowly. "I actually have something else in mind. But I'll give it some thought if that's ok?"

"Of course." she said. AJ shuffled his feet and Dammit stood, circled twice and flopped down again. AJ repositioned the lead and the tags on her collar jingled.

"Have you got anymore details about your new billet?" He asked finally.

Joey nodded. "I talked to my detailer Friday. He's sending over a briefing file for me to go through. I didn't ask him any questions." She waited a minute and when he didn't say anything. She moved away from him on the bench and turned so she could look at him more directly.

"I guess I'm in denial. I can't believe its turned out this way. I'm going to miss you."

AJ eyed her speculatively. He looked down at his feet then. This was the moment. Resigning had taken a certain courage which he had found easily, but this next step took nearly all he had. Finally he looked at her and shifted towards her on the bench.

"Maybe you've heard," he said "I resigned on Monday."

"AJ you didn't." She paled slightly. "It won't help me."

"No" he said, "I didn't do it for you." AJ shifted on the bench dropping his eyes to the dog at his feet. "It's complicated," he said, looking at her again. "I didn't do it with the intention of helping you out of this situation. I did it because professionally it is time for me to move on." Here he paused. The silence dragged as he began to switch the dog's leash from one hand to the other as he patted his coat pockets. Finally he reached inside the windbreaker and unzipped an interior pocket. His fist was tightly closed when he brought it out. He sat down beside her on the bench.

He said. "I listed my house for sale this week too."

"AJ?" She said. "Why?"

"Look I love you. I'm sorry about this mess over your career. But I'm not prepared for you to move on to a new post without me. If you go, we should go together." he paused then and slid off the bench onto one knee. The dog startled stood up and wagged her tail slowly. "What I'm trying to ask you is would you like to get married before I leave the Navy or after?"

Joey couldn't have been more stunned if he'd said he was running away to join the circus. She could hear the thud of her heart in her chest, but the warmth of the afternoon sun and bright green of the new spring foliage had all faded.

She looked into his face upturned, waiting for an answer. A ring sparkled in his hand.

"AJ" she shook her head slowly to clear the fog. "I don't know. I never expected. We never." Finally she reached out touching his arm and said "Just give me a minute. Sit with me."

He settled on the bench. The minutes stretching out. He had thought this through endlessly. At one time mission planning was a large part of his work and even now logistics wound their way into nearly everything he touched. But this stalling wasn't the reaction he expected. He had hoped she'd leap into his arms and accept immediately, but he knew thinking now more clearly than the past few days that that this quiet consideration was something he loved in her. She was spontaneous in small things, but thoughtful in all else.

"Do you love me?" He asked quietly. She turned and looked at him.

"Yes, of course" she said. "You're asking a lot AJ. We've never even discussed this."

"So lets talk about it now." He said.

"Big wedding or small?" She said.

"Big" he said "invite all our friends and coworkers and associates, but keep it casual."

"Right" she said. "When?"

"As soon as we can arrange it, within the month if possible." Joey nodded her agreement.

"What about my career?" She asked.

"Where ever you're posted, we go together. Married housing on base if necessary."

She nodded. "Will you work?"

"Yes, I'll practice law when I can or teach maybe."

"No children, right?" She said.

"Right, no children."

"What about the dog?" AJ looked at the dog laying at his feet, resting her muzzle on Joey's sneaker.

"Joint custody."

She laughed out loud. "Damn you AJ." She held out her left hand and he slid the glittering ring on to her finger.

There" he said. He leaned in and kissed her gently.

"I love you AJ." She said.. He let out a long sigh.

"Relieved?" she said.

"Yeah" he said, "there's already been an offer on my house and I wondered where I was going to live."

"AJ, you don't want a wife." She said pulling back slightly. "You want welfare and a room mate." She punched him lightly in the shoulder.

He shrugged and got to his feet, pulling her up and into a bear hug. "To late to turn back now." he said with a grin. He kissed her and she stalled as long as she could before responding. Dammit got to her feet too, and took this opportunity to revaluate her position. She circled them twice, drawing her leash tight against their legs, then laid down in a heap, while the kissing continued.

Note ... if you've read this far I'd appreciate some feedback. What did you love? What did you hate? Thanks!


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